Last night we went out to dinner with some friends. They brought their young daughter with them to meet us. She is a songwriter and wanted to “pick our brains” a little. Since we enjoy the mentoring process… and we were getting a free meal… we gladly went.
This happens a lot these days. Young people. Brain picking. I used to think that it was my reputation, my many years in the industry, that drew the young ones to me for advice. I’m starting to realize that it’s probably because every year that passes I look more and more like Yoda. Who better to get advice from? Sage council I am.
(I really need to moisturize)
Last night the young one asked me a great question. She asked if I was going to finish the fried artichokes and if not….could she have some? No, wait. That wasn’t the question. She asked:
“Do you look back on your career and have any regrets?”
My first, knee jerk answer was to say no. Honestly… my life has wildly exceeded my wildest dreams so why would I have any regrets?
Then I stopped and thought for a while. Then I realized, like the Sinatra song says:
“Regrets, I’ve had a few…. da doo doo doo… something else…”
There was the time my friend asked me to write with her because she was writing that day with a teenager (which can be exhausting) and wanted another “real” writer in the room. I told her “No. I have just written seven days in a row and I need a day off.”
So I didn’t write that day with her and Taylor Swift.
I regret that.
There’s the fact that I never learned the business side of my profession. For many years I had a large corporation to take care of all that. I was the “artist” and above the day to day minutia. I would create the art, loftily hand it off to someone who then would protect my ownership, get it recorded, collect my money, send it to my accountant, who would then pick out a nice new car and have it delivered to my driveway.
When I stopped working for “the man” I had to take all that on myself. Did you know that when you write a song, record it and then save it to your hard drive..…it does NOT end up on the radio the next day? I did not know that.
I never took classes in the music BUSINESS.
I regret that.
When I dropped out of college (no regret there) I headed to California with my band. We were going to be the house band at the Troubadour and back up Jackson Browne and become the Eagles a year before they did. We were just going to maker a quick stop in Santa Cruz. Really quick. In and out. You can wait in the car.
We never left. That town sucked us in and we stayed for three years. The band broke up. At that moment I had to decide whether to go on to LA and The Troub (as I liked to call it)…or go back home to Connecticut with my musical tail between my legs.
I went back home. I never got the chance to play the Troubadour and see how I stacked up against the Jackson Brownes, the David Crosbys…become besties with Michael Nesmith and sleep with Joni.
I regret that. (Not the Joni part. Not my type. But if LINDA had been hanging around….)
We all have regrets. They are the score cards that tell us where we are in the game. I have many more regrets than just the three listed here.
“But then again…too few to mention!!!”
Just remembered the next line.